Monday, September 26, 2011

I Haven't Got a Stitch to Wear

So I had my 10 year high school reunion, full of good and bad experiences. I was unsure if I want,togo because I of the emotional state I've been in, my lack of accomplishments, and the fact that I was sure people didn't know me. In high schoolmany people knew of me but never really knew me. It's not to surprising because I was no where close to open with anyone.


A group of us I'm the sober one.

First I'll start with bad stuff and get it out of the way. I hung out with my brother during the day. My Mom came and joined us as well. There were some awkward moments. At the reunion I was super nervous and it showed.There were many awkward pauses in conversations. I wasn't feeling confident. There were many instance where I was standing or sitting alone silent. It reminded me of how much I need to work on my confidence.
Stacy and I (ignore the creepy glowing eyes.)

The good part. It was good to reconnect with people. I got to chat with Jerri, it was great. She is one of my favorite people from high school. We went to prom together and had a blast. Stacy is another person I was excited to see. I learned she had a big crush on me in highschool, I think she felt comfortable telling me that after I told her I was gay. I loved reconnecting with people who I didn't think I would.

Ajiaga and I (She kept running her hand through my hair.)


The best part was that I was comfortable with being gay. I didn't feel judged, I didn't feel like I had to be someone I'm not. I felt authentic and the oppression was lifted. I want that here, I want to be able to joke about the gay genes I inherited, the ways I fit the stereotypes, and any other funny aspect of being gay. I want my response to the question "would you date her?" to be "I like dudes." I just want the oppression to end. I have less than three months left here at BYU and then its time to move on. It'll time for the oppression to end. I will be able to be myself, to search for a life partner. My search will finally be the right sex. I will be able to work on creating a life of happiness, integrity, and love.

Jerri and I (She is still Beautiful)

I kind of hate how incredibly cheesy that was.

1 comment:

  1. This post made me so happy!:) I'm glad you had a good time!

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