So I know I just blogged but I'm going to do it again. So I had a great discussion with my friend Jeff mostly about inner moral conflicts. I really enjoyed the discussion because I now understand him and know him more. By learning about him and his feelings and thoughts I was able to correct some of my thoughts and feelings. I know my logic is not perfect and I find many contradictions. So I always try to look for ways to make my logic more correct.
After discussing many topics with Jeff I have learned some good ways to correct my logic. I have learned a greater understanding of the south and its past and current situation. I feel much more comfortable with the confederate flag and most importantly I re learned that I need to broaden my understanding of others.
The best part of the discussion with Jeff is that I felt like I mattered and made a difference while talking to him. I never know if I'll ever come out of this depression, but its nice to hear someone still think you are worth it when you feel you aren't worth shit. I want to thank him for his friendship and hope that I will gain the courage soon. But if not and he reads this. Then I'd like to say "thank you, Jeff. You have helped me more than you realize. Your assistance seemed to b e involuntary because it didn't seem like you trying to help me. I felt like you were just being yourself. Thank you."
Every night I go to bed and wish death by morning. However, tonight I look forward to a morning where I will accomplish great things, be successful and do it all alive.
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