Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Back to Provo, Depression and Loneliness

So I just got back from California. Wow was it an adventure! I had a great time and am so glad to be home in Provo. We only took on fun day in San Fran, but I enjoyed everything (except knocking doors). I do have pictures and I'll put them up sometime. Any way I just wanted to note a couple of things. First it was so nice to have a friend to hang out with, even if it we were working the whole time. I know I have friends but they are all married so I don't get to spend as much time with them as I like. I guess I could be a pest and come over all the time, but no one likes that. It was so nice to get to know someone better and have great meaningful discussions. Even if I'm not so smart and experienced.
Second it was so nice to see my friend Jeff re-unite with his family. I could tell that he missed them a lot. When we pulled in to his drive way and his wife saw him she was so excited. His boys were just as excited to see him. I could tell that Jeff was a great father and husband, no matter what he thinks.
It was really nice to see that reunion. I want that in my life someday. A family that I can devote my life to. Whether I end up having the traditional family (i.e. father, mother, daughter and son) or a more nontraditional family (me and those I help in far away countries) I want that same unconditional love with someone I care for and about. But until that day when I feel like I can connect with others on a full time basis. I will continue to travel this road of life a lone. As for right now I'm going to watch south park to block the nociceptor of my emotional network.

2 comments:

  1. You're nuts to think that you'd be a pest. We love hanging out with you and if you came over all the time, we would be so so happy. :) For serious. We want you to.

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  2. Hey I know how you feel about the whole married thing in Provo thats one of the many reasons I left...I miss you! I hope life is going well in provo and as soon as i get a phone we should chat! I miss you and hanging out with you! :-(

    Love you!
    BRI

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